Sunday, June 29, 2014

Feeling Devastated: Possible murder/suicide/homicide

In what many are calling a possible murder/suicide/homicide/tragedy...my favorite Victoria Secret bra died in the dryer early this morning. Literally ripped strap from strap--leaving padding strewn amidst fading, damp towels--the remains were nearly unidentifiable.
     It has been said, and I quote, "The deceased was dearly loved, unforgettable. Able to bolster--even in the darkest of times."
Authorities on the matter have yet to decide the exact cause of death, although "failure to read a label" is one of the likelihoods under review.
     Others were slightly injured--i. e. my flippin' dryer--although workers (myself included) have reported no worries of lasting injuries.
     Survived by two implants.

Can we please take a moment of silence to pause for a damn bra--that cost more than my life is worth on some days!
...
...
...
Thank you!
*heading to Wal-mart to buy a cheaper bra that can withstand being in the throes of a dryer*


 photo bra_zpsdb7de3d6.jpg
Dedicated to posting a silly picture each day for a year. Please see my previous and future posts for more.

3 comments:

  1. Middle Child,

    Didn't Mommy ever teach you not to put bras in the dryer? Don't you dare buy a bra at Wal-Mart. You march yourself back to VS or go online (they have lots of clearance bras online) and you buy another VS bra. Wash it in a lingerie bag in cold water on gentle, or even better, hand wash VS bras. Then hang them other the shower curtain rod to dry. Don't you ever let me catch you in a Wal-Mart bra, nor in a Wal-Mart. Our family does not shop at Wal-Mart.

    Love,
    Your Mother From Another Planet, who laughed so hard at your post that Willy Dunne Wooters is mystified

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is what happens when I go bra shopping...

    http://mom2mentalmidgets.blogspot.com/2010/07/boys-please-leave-room.html

    ReplyDelete
  3. My condolences… I hope you find a worthy replacement.

    ReplyDelete